I’ve got Dave Matthews stuck in my head. It’s the song “The Space Between”. This ear worm has been trying to tell me something.
Over the past week I started noticing a weird pattern of emotions. I just got back from vacation and was both full of ‘get caught up energy’ and also some malaise about actually getting caught up. One day I checked some things off the list and felt good about it, and then was surprised to find nothing else seemed that important to do. A day later I found myself just feeling down in one of those inexplicable ways we sometimes do. The next day I had a million things I remembered to do. My kids are full of back to college energy - shopping for room things, disappearing for one last hang with this friend or that. My husband has back to school energy - in the form of time management ideas and fitness routines. I became aware of being more short-tempered with him than usual.
I realized that I am experiencing the discomfort of “The Space Between”. Between summer and fall. Between vacation and school. Between family of four bonding and the return of the empty nest. I love summer and vacation and family of four bonding. I also love fall and routine, and the quiet freedom of that empty nest. What’s hard is it is still really hot, but we’re not really playing in the sun. What’s hard is that my children are physically here, but their hearts have already turned back to their independent lives at school. That the truth is, I can’t really ‘get caught up’ or back to routine because it’s late August and most everyone is stuck in their own version of the in-between, so progress is slow.
I like to think that generally, I’ve gotten good at living in the present moment as much as possible and trying to appreciate it for what it is. But this energy>malaise>irritability loop I’ve been in alerted me to this underlying discomfort about where I’m currently sitting.
In yoga and meditation, breath is always a primary focus. We inhale, we exhale. In the between, there is a pause where really, we aren’t breathing at all. The Sanskrit term “kumbhaka” is used to describe this place. It actually translates to “pot” or “pitcher”. The container where we hold all we took in with that inhale. We absorb its nutrients, then empty it as we exhale. Fullness to emptiness, energy to stillness. Over and over again, twenty thousand times a day.
This late August kumbhaka isn’t comfortable. I’m longing for my kids who haven’t even left yet. But I’m also longing for the peace their departures will bring. I’m longing for routines that have not yet been established. I’m also missing the lazy float in the pool which I could technically still do but don’t really feel like it. I’m ready to exhale, but for now I have to pause in this still moment.
What I’m Consuming…
Books
The Calamity Club
by Kathryn Stockett
A wonderful epic tale of Southern women taking control of their destinies through tough times from the author of The Help. I listened to the audiobook and the actors are terrific. It’s a long one - the kind you’re glad you’ve still got around. Excellent driving home from vacation or back to college listening.
ADHD Podcasts
I don’t have ADHD, but many of my clients do and I like to stay as informed as possible about it. The awareness and understanding of it is evolving almost as fast as AI and knowledge is power. Here are two podcasts by and for people with ADHD that help bridge the gaps.
I have an ever-evolving list of ADHD resources. You can access that here.
What’s Anne Been Up To
On one side of this pause, I completed my 200 hours of Yoga Teacher training. I had the pleasure of speaking to multiple groups on resilience, mental fitness, productivity and organizing. I got to spend time with my grand nephew, and took a nice float down the Shenandoah River.
When the fall finally arrives, I’ll be doing workshops, more presentations, mental fitness courses, and visiting my babies at college. Stay tuned and if you need a speaker for your group or event, Send me an email to learn more.
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